Who Wears the Pants?

The lesson last night in the Super Bowl commercials seemed to be that men do not “wear the pants” in any modern arena. Was anyone else struck by the man-bashing in the Super Bowl ads? While I was thankful there was no re-occurrence of the Janet Jackson “bra failure,” it seemed the advertisers held a meeting to see how else they could paint men in the stupidest possible light.

Taking Doritos from Children

Doritos highlighted the masculine leadership dilemma for the African American community, pointing out that black men leave women to mother alone, so they can chase other women with other children. Since men have largely abdicated the responsibility in that community, the commercial seemed to say, young children must protect the home, the mother, and the Doritos from the ravenous, sex-seeking, Doritos eating Man.

Then there were the Dodge and FloTV commercials. Dodge featured the “typical” beleaguered and dazed male in close-up while a litany of humiliations he endures at the hands of his female other, by the hour, on a daily basis, rolled through in a voice over. For Dodge, the focus was that adult men, all over the world, have no masculine behavior left to them but racing a hot, black car down the road.

FloTV emphasized the stereotypical bored-man-following-materialistic-woman-around-the-shopping-mall like the pet the advertiser sought to make him, holding her purse as she tried on shoes and clothes. Insulting female stereotypes aside, wouldn’t watching the game on your cell phone make all these demeaning, menial activities so much more enjoyable? I mean, he was certainly not portrayed as holding the woman’s purse or being present with her out of love and a spirit of charity.

No Pants Allowed
 
In case you guys get to thinking you might “wear the pants” at work, CareerBuilder hopes to disabuse you of that notion by highlighting careers at companies with semi-naked workplaces. I know I have worked in several of those, haven’t you?

And Dockers claims you men don’t wear pants anywhere at all, and are happier for it. Their commercial followed a group of you in underwear on a pilgrimage through a wheat field singing about how happy you men are to be relieved of, and freed from, the unfair constrictions and responsibilities of pants.

For those who sadly believed they already were men, Dove rolled out “Men Care” which consists, not of nurturing, support and respect, but solely of body wash and shampoo, with a jazzy aftershave scent, I am sure. The jingle implied that manhood requires body wash.

How About We All Wear Jesus Instead

I’d just like to say that I do not “force,” or even ask, my husband to carry my purse (although he would if I needed him to), he has never used body wash except when I have forgotten to buy a bar of soap, drives a Suburban that holds all our fishing, hiking and camping gear and can still go 120, and has never worn a leopard print thong or had a spray tan like Jim McMahon.

He just tries to raise two quality sons, be a loving husband to me, and a responsible employee. He doesn’t do it for the money; there’s never enough. He doesn’t do it for the glory, because the glory won’t be revealed until heaven. He does it because he’s a real man: solid, steady, sacrificial, true, and loyal.

At the dinner table recently, after having been up at 4:30 and worked all day, he gave up the last piece of chicken on the table for my son without a single word. It made me angry at first, because I knew he had skipped lunch that day and probably wanted and needed it, and shouldn’t the best of anything go to the one who works hardest?

But God literally silenced me, when I would have intervened, to point out the picture of sacrifice it painted for us all. A small thing, yes, but it hit me hard, and I have never loved or respected my husband more than in that moment.

The one man allowed any respect by advertisers last night was Tim Tebow who was celebrated as a labor of love by his mother, while the commercial that honored him was decried in other media by the shrieking No Parenthood types. When is the social pendulum going to finally reassert itself into some modicum of balance?

For me, the most celebrated night of advertising of the year proved how pervasive the agenda is to effeminate modern men. It makes me sick. As God “works all things together for the good,” I will personally use it to motivate actions that inspire and build up healthy, godly masculinity in my husband and boys, and men in general. Ladies, it begins with us. It always does.